I was going to title this post "I'm a Mama," but I've been a Mama and making parental decisions since I first found out I was pregnant.
It's been a few months since I last posted which has been a combination of sleep deprivation and taking care of the baby and myself.
The birth didn't go as I had "planned" meaning that it would happen at home in a peaceful environment. The midwife kept stressing me out and we had to keep having her leave. After being in labor, with non-stop contractions, for 50 hours, we decided to go to the hospital where they C-sectioned me.
I've been trying to find resources online or locally for Birth Trauma survivors, but so far have only found chapters in Canada and the UK.
It has been a daily struggle for me to function since the birth, but being the strong willed person that I am, I am able to force the autopilot in me to kick in and do the things that I need to take care of my sweet baby.
With the lack of resources here and my faith in the intelligence of Germans again shattered, I am not very motivated to interact with the world outside or to seek their "help." It's something that I am still working on. It is odd but my anger and aggressiveness is better received by the Germans that I interact with, i.e. they are friendlier, than when I am polite. It's a reflection of the character of the culture - this ambivalence about the well-being of the other person and almost being happy about their misery. In my cultural anthropology class from a few years ago, we talked about how a language reflects the people for example there is no word for privacy in Italian. In Italy, it is not rude to stare and people openly talk about other people's lives - it is just part of the culture that everyone's life is everyone's business. What does it say about Germans who have a word for taking joy in another's misery "Schadenfreude." I think the concept of privacy is also new to Germans as it sounds like words they've put together by translating from English. In German it is called "Privatssphäre" lit. private sphere but does not really carry the same meaning of right, i.e. it is my right to have privacy.
I've been toying with the idea of creating my own support group with meetings and activities, but I've really got to have a focus or it will go all over the place and fall apart.
The most devastating part of the whole birth experience was having other people, "experts" tell me that I was ignorant and stupid over and over again when I had actually read and researched extensively and I had to fight to get them to shut up, to let me move my body the way and in the positions that I wanted to, etc. when I didn't want their "assistance" in the first place. The only reason we had a midwife there at all was cosmetic and she was only there to support my husband that is why I hired her, that's it. I feel like half of me has died and I'm desperately trying to find the way out and a way to bring it back to life.
So, that's the reason for the big gap in posts. I wanted to write and make something whole and good by putting together this blog and I didn't want to rant and vent but just provide information. I've worked out for myself that even the bad things need to be posted and spoken about so that pregnant women are prepared for what could happen - the emotional and psychological abuse by the people that are supposed to help - and for those who have gone through similar situations to know that they are not alone.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Friday, April 29, 2011
Done Being Pregnant?
With my due date only a few days away, I've been trying to find ways to speed things along. In Germany it is very common for pregnant women to drink raspberry leaf tea starting at the 32 week as it conditions and tones the uterus. After 36 weeks you're supposed to up your tea drinking to two cups. I've actually noticed on days where I've remembered to drink both cups that I have more contractions and that the baby seems to push down - i.e. tries to settle it's head into my pelvis.
Another thing that is supposed to help is sex. Semen contains a hormone called prostaglandin which softens the cervix and orgasm releases oxytocin which relaxes your tissues, releases love endorphins and is the natural labor inducing chemical in our bodies. Here is an article about prostaglandin from WebMD .
I've been thinking about breech birth a lot lately, as you can probably tell from my last post... And in this clip you will see a few acupressure points demonstrated which are supposed to induce labor, but also the points on the little toes that I mentioned in the breech blog entry which is supposed to motivate a baby to turn and get into an optimal birthing position. Acupressure Points for Labor Induction
Here is a neat list of Natural Induction Methods .
Here's a great acupressure site with wonderful video howtos and point descriptions for your partner to use on you during labor to help with pain management. Debra Betts
Another thing that is supposed to help is sex. Semen contains a hormone called prostaglandin which softens the cervix and orgasm releases oxytocin which relaxes your tissues, releases love endorphins and is the natural labor inducing chemical in our bodies. Here is an article about prostaglandin from WebMD .
I've been thinking about breech birth a lot lately, as you can probably tell from my last post... And in this clip you will see a few acupressure points demonstrated which are supposed to induce labor, but also the points on the little toes that I mentioned in the breech blog entry which is supposed to motivate a baby to turn and get into an optimal birthing position. Acupressure Points for Labor Induction
Here is a neat list of Natural Induction Methods .
Here's a great acupressure site with wonderful video howtos and point descriptions for your partner to use on you during labor to help with pain management. Debra Betts
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Breech Birth - A Normal Birth
My baby was breech until the 36th week. My midwife was very panicky about this and scared the living daylights out of me... So I just wanted to say a few words about breech and share the things that worked for me.
If you read information provided by a hospital, breech is treated like a terminal emergency illness. They either want to C-section or drug you, give you a colossal episiotomy and use forceps to yank the baby's head out.
All of the midwife resources I've read and "viewed" in terms of videos all stress the importance of being hands off. Even footling breech (where it's not the buns that come out first but one foot at a time) do not seem to pose a big issue for properly trained midwives. All of the info I've read has suggested that being in an all 4 position is the best as it opens up more space in your pelvis.
Concerns about breech birth:
1. One concern is that the baby's feet do not put as much pressure on your cervix to open it as widely for the birth of the head. Therefore there is the fear that when the feet come first that the baby's head might get stuck as it's the biggest part of the baby's body, while you wait for the opening to expand. This is where doctors will attempt to rip the baby out of you, potentially causing a plethora damage and injuries to the baby - and then blame you for your "risky" birth choice.
2. Another concern is that the umbilical chord might get squished during the delivery, cutting off oxygen and blood supply to the baby.
How to do it right:
According to all of the midwife resources I've read, it is important to be hands off so as not to startle the baby. The baby and mama are in the middle of concentrating really hard and listening to their bodies and the last thing the baby needs is someone else in the mix that they have no attachment to yanking them around, stressing them out, etc. There are some resources that suggest the supporting the baby as it's coming out has a comforting effect - but all the videos I've seen do not have the midwife involved at all. So, no touching.
Do not panic or be afraid of the head getting stuck. There are a few techniques the midwife can use as an intervention to help get the baby's head in the right position. Ina May Gaskin's book Spiritual Midwifery has got a good section on how they would tilt the head. Also, here's a video of a footling breech birth that is hands off but the text gives you a description of one of the techniques. Homebirth: A Midwife Mutiny And another footling breech birth page: Footling Breech Birth
Do not allow yourself to be drugged! It is very important that you are sober and able to feel your baby moving with you and that you are connected to you body as well. Any drugs you take go directly into baby's system which clouds the baby's consciousness and self awareness in the birthing process.
Water birth for breech is supposed to be especially good because the baby goes from a supported weightless environment in the mama to a supported, weightless environment in the birthing pool. View breech home water birth - The background music is extremely annoying, so turn your volume way down...
If you would like to have a hospital breech birth, I think this link is from the hospital perspective in Britain...Notice all of the restrictions they put on you: Hospital Breech Birth
Turning Baby:
Spinning Babies was a great resource for me when I was trying to get my baby to turn. I personally do not believe in being uncomfortable so some of the options that I considered and things that I did are:
* I'd spend as much time as was comfortable on all 4s. It makes more space in your belly and hips for the baby to move around. I'd also sway my hips back and forth and try to make little circles.
* I love taking baths, so I'd also get on all 4s in the tub and sway my hips back and forth. In water the baby is weightless which makes rotating easier.
* My baby had it's back on my left the whole time - because I slept exclusively on my left because it's supposed to be better for the baby as your heart's on your left - anyway, I started sleeping more on my right and then making it a point to change sides regularly during the night.
* I'd gently rub my belly in the direction that I wanted the baby to turn while talking to it and drinking juice - sugar is supposed to wake baby up :)
* For the past 7 weeks, I've been going to a mineral bath - which is like a public pool here. The water isn't very deep and I'd float stomach down and have my husband rub my lower back as I rock back and forth.
* I'd also heard about acupuncture points on the outsides of your little toes as being points that motivate the baby to turn, but I never got to that point.
Obviously, not all of the positions on Spinning Babies are uncomfortable. If you feel like experimenting with flash lights or head phones or people talking to your lower belly, go for it!
Like I said, my baby turned at 36 weeks, which was a great relief with what I listed up there.
There are also techniques the midwife can try to externally rotate your baby but it was explained to me that I would need to go to the hospital and have it done in the emergency room in case their yanking and pulling on my baby caused the placenta - the oxygen and blood supplier to the baby - to separate from my body (womb). Hmm. That doesn't sound nice. There's also a diagram of this procedure - which looks just like someone rubbing your belly but actually groping the baby's legs and head and shoving them along... - in Gaskin's book (see above).
My suggestion as a mother who was looking at natural delivery options is to not let yourself get bullied by doctors who have been trained to see everything as a problem with an interventionist i.e. surgical/drug solution. Stand up for yourself and your baby. Keep in mind that no one cares about the health and safety of your baby more than you and that you have to be the one to protect it. Be informed and choose qualified staff that you trust and give them your requests in writing - get them to sign your copy and take multiple copies of your birth plan with you to the hospital, if that's where you choose to go, so they cannot conveniently have lost it and go one with their own agenda.
If you read information provided by a hospital, breech is treated like a terminal emergency illness. They either want to C-section or drug you, give you a colossal episiotomy and use forceps to yank the baby's head out.
All of the midwife resources I've read and "viewed" in terms of videos all stress the importance of being hands off. Even footling breech (where it's not the buns that come out first but one foot at a time) do not seem to pose a big issue for properly trained midwives. All of the info I've read has suggested that being in an all 4 position is the best as it opens up more space in your pelvis.
Concerns about breech birth:
1. One concern is that the baby's feet do not put as much pressure on your cervix to open it as widely for the birth of the head. Therefore there is the fear that when the feet come first that the baby's head might get stuck as it's the biggest part of the baby's body, while you wait for the opening to expand. This is where doctors will attempt to rip the baby out of you, potentially causing a plethora damage and injuries to the baby - and then blame you for your "risky" birth choice.
2. Another concern is that the umbilical chord might get squished during the delivery, cutting off oxygen and blood supply to the baby.
How to do it right:
According to all of the midwife resources I've read, it is important to be hands off so as not to startle the baby. The baby and mama are in the middle of concentrating really hard and listening to their bodies and the last thing the baby needs is someone else in the mix that they have no attachment to yanking them around, stressing them out, etc. There are some resources that suggest the supporting the baby as it's coming out has a comforting effect - but all the videos I've seen do not have the midwife involved at all. So, no touching.
Do not panic or be afraid of the head getting stuck. There are a few techniques the midwife can use as an intervention to help get the baby's head in the right position. Ina May Gaskin's book Spiritual Midwifery has got a good section on how they would tilt the head. Also, here's a video of a footling breech birth that is hands off but the text gives you a description of one of the techniques. Homebirth: A Midwife Mutiny And another footling breech birth page: Footling Breech Birth
Do not allow yourself to be drugged! It is very important that you are sober and able to feel your baby moving with you and that you are connected to you body as well. Any drugs you take go directly into baby's system which clouds the baby's consciousness and self awareness in the birthing process.
Water birth for breech is supposed to be especially good because the baby goes from a supported weightless environment in the mama to a supported, weightless environment in the birthing pool. View breech home water birth - The background music is extremely annoying, so turn your volume way down...
If you would like to have a hospital breech birth, I think this link is from the hospital perspective in Britain...Notice all of the restrictions they put on you: Hospital Breech Birth
Turning Baby:
Spinning Babies was a great resource for me when I was trying to get my baby to turn. I personally do not believe in being uncomfortable so some of the options that I considered and things that I did are:
* I'd spend as much time as was comfortable on all 4s. It makes more space in your belly and hips for the baby to move around. I'd also sway my hips back and forth and try to make little circles.
* I love taking baths, so I'd also get on all 4s in the tub and sway my hips back and forth. In water the baby is weightless which makes rotating easier.
* My baby had it's back on my left the whole time - because I slept exclusively on my left because it's supposed to be better for the baby as your heart's on your left - anyway, I started sleeping more on my right and then making it a point to change sides regularly during the night.
* I'd gently rub my belly in the direction that I wanted the baby to turn while talking to it and drinking juice - sugar is supposed to wake baby up :)
* For the past 7 weeks, I've been going to a mineral bath - which is like a public pool here. The water isn't very deep and I'd float stomach down and have my husband rub my lower back as I rock back and forth.
* I'd also heard about acupuncture points on the outsides of your little toes as being points that motivate the baby to turn, but I never got to that point.
Obviously, not all of the positions on Spinning Babies are uncomfortable. If you feel like experimenting with flash lights or head phones or people talking to your lower belly, go for it!
Like I said, my baby turned at 36 weeks, which was a great relief with what I listed up there.
There are also techniques the midwife can try to externally rotate your baby but it was explained to me that I would need to go to the hospital and have it done in the emergency room in case their yanking and pulling on my baby caused the placenta - the oxygen and blood supplier to the baby - to separate from my body (womb). Hmm. That doesn't sound nice. There's also a diagram of this procedure - which looks just like someone rubbing your belly but actually groping the baby's legs and head and shoving them along... - in Gaskin's book (see above).
My suggestion as a mother who was looking at natural delivery options is to not let yourself get bullied by doctors who have been trained to see everything as a problem with an interventionist i.e. surgical/drug solution. Stand up for yourself and your baby. Keep in mind that no one cares about the health and safety of your baby more than you and that you have to be the one to protect it. Be informed and choose qualified staff that you trust and give them your requests in writing - get them to sign your copy and take multiple copies of your birth plan with you to the hospital, if that's where you choose to go, so they cannot conveniently have lost it and go one with their own agenda.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Starting out with EC
Elimination Communication is an idea that I've taken to a lot lately. I just finished Christine Gross-Loh's Diaper Free Baby and feel like I have a basic understanding of the technique and will try to EC my newborn from the beginning.
Just to explain a little about what EC is, it is basically tuning in to your child's elimination needs just as you have a basic awareness of when baby is sleepy or hungry. You keep a mental note of when baby needs to go to the bathroom and enable your baby to go to the bathroom in a place other than a diaper stuck on her butt (no one wants to marinate in a seepage of irritating bacterial waste).
One of the main thoughts behind EC is that babies have to concentrate and are aware of when they are going to the bathroom. This awareness generally disappears after years of wearing diapers and being trained to ignore their bodies. Potty training toddlers is all about getting them to reconnect with the muscles and feelings involved with going to the bathroom. The idea with Elimination Communication is that you try to keep your baby aware of his/her muscles by using a cue when he (let's go with the literary "he") is going or about to go. You aren't training your baby do anything. You aren't forcing or trying to bribe your baby into holding it to go at "the right time." In a nutshell, all you are really doing is communicating with your baby - and that can be the full extent of what you do. Full stop. Most parents who practice EC go a step farther and take their babies to the bathroom where they go in the toilet, sink, shower - whatever works, or in potty chairs, bowls or whatever else they have handy and works for them.
EC-ing Your Newborn
1. The first step is to get to know your baby's habits. Most babies go more often during the morning and less during the afternoon. A common time is also after a nap and during/after a feeding. At this young, it takes your baby a lot of concentration to activate the right muscles and they may cry, go quiet, go on and off the breast if feeding... because they need to go and are trying to figure it out "again."
2. The second part is cuing. If you notice that your baby is going, give the baby a soft vocal cue. The most common for peeing is a "sssssssss," "shhhhhh" or "psssssssss" sound. You don't actually need two different sounds but a lot of parents have them ("puhpuhpuh," for pooh for example).
3. If you want to give your baby alternatives to going in the diaper, please visit this link for positions with pictures on Earth Babies . You can hold your baby over really anything or have them go outside if you like.
So, that's what I've learned and what I'll be trying with Mini when he/she gets here. :o)
Happy Parenting!
Susan
Just to explain a little about what EC is, it is basically tuning in to your child's elimination needs just as you have a basic awareness of when baby is sleepy or hungry. You keep a mental note of when baby needs to go to the bathroom and enable your baby to go to the bathroom in a place other than a diaper stuck on her butt (no one wants to marinate in a seepage of irritating bacterial waste).
One of the main thoughts behind EC is that babies have to concentrate and are aware of when they are going to the bathroom. This awareness generally disappears after years of wearing diapers and being trained to ignore their bodies. Potty training toddlers is all about getting them to reconnect with the muscles and feelings involved with going to the bathroom. The idea with Elimination Communication is that you try to keep your baby aware of his/her muscles by using a cue when he (let's go with the literary "he") is going or about to go. You aren't training your baby do anything. You aren't forcing or trying to bribe your baby into holding it to go at "the right time." In a nutshell, all you are really doing is communicating with your baby - and that can be the full extent of what you do. Full stop. Most parents who practice EC go a step farther and take their babies to the bathroom where they go in the toilet, sink, shower - whatever works, or in potty chairs, bowls or whatever else they have handy and works for them.
EC-ing Your Newborn
1. The first step is to get to know your baby's habits. Most babies go more often during the morning and less during the afternoon. A common time is also after a nap and during/after a feeding. At this young, it takes your baby a lot of concentration to activate the right muscles and they may cry, go quiet, go on and off the breast if feeding... because they need to go and are trying to figure it out "again."
2. The second part is cuing. If you notice that your baby is going, give the baby a soft vocal cue. The most common for peeing is a "sssssssss," "shhhhhh" or "psssssssss" sound. You don't actually need two different sounds but a lot of parents have them ("puhpuhpuh," for pooh for example).
3. If you want to give your baby alternatives to going in the diaper, please visit this link for positions with pictures on Earth Babies . You can hold your baby over really anything or have them go outside if you like.
So, that's what I've learned and what I'll be trying with Mini when he/she gets here. :o)
Happy Parenting!
Susan
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Toxins, Europe and USA
A minute ago I was reading an article on how to make shampoo from vinegar and baking soda when at the end of the paragraph, the author mentioned that her interest in this science project of a grooming ritual actually came from a cancer survivor who introduced her to the Environmental Health Group's Cosmetic Safety Database . This database gives you a rating of companies and their products on a scale from 1-10 with 10 being the most toxic.
I mentioned this link to my husband along with the least toxic baby products manufacturer ( California Baby ) and he mentioned that it's a known fact that products contain toxins - fair enough - and that it is commonly known that products in the US contain more toxins because the EU has stricter standards when it comes to which ingredients can be put in consumer products. Wha? It sounded crazy to think that products bought and sold in America could be more dangerous for myself, my baby...just everyone, really.
My husband sent me this link which kind of explains why things can be more toxic in the States:
"In place of government oversight and ingredients regulations, the industry instead relies on its own self-funded Cosmetic Ingredient Review panel, which is theoretically responsible for assuring that the ingredients found in cosmetic and similar products are safe for consumer use.
In it’s almost 30 years of existence, however, that panel has reviewed just 11% of the 10,500 cosmetic ingredients listed by the FDA. According to the Environmental Working Group, the remaining unassessed 89% of ingredients are used in over 99% of all products on the market."
So basically, instead of a neutral group of scientists testing the ingredients, people hired by the cosmetic industry are the ones conducting the tests... Hmmm.
As Europe has higher standards for what is deemed safe, some companies opt to sell different versions of their products where the less toxic versions are sold in Europe and the cheaper, more dangerous variants are sold in America.
If you are in an activist kind of mood, you can visit The Campaign for Safe Cosmetics website and find out more about what steps you can take to pressure better regulation of toxic substances... Ultimately your dollar does the voting, so please have a look at the Cosmetic Safety Database and don't buy poisonous products - regardless if they are on sale!! I'll keep you posted on natural options for skin and body care and hopefully natural medicinal care as I learn more about it.
I mentioned this link to my husband along with the least toxic baby products manufacturer ( California Baby ) and he mentioned that it's a known fact that products contain toxins - fair enough - and that it is commonly known that products in the US contain more toxins because the EU has stricter standards when it comes to which ingredients can be put in consumer products. Wha? It sounded crazy to think that products bought and sold in America could be more dangerous for myself, my baby...just everyone, really.
My husband sent me this link which kind of explains why things can be more toxic in the States:
"In place of government oversight and ingredients regulations, the industry instead relies on its own self-funded Cosmetic Ingredient Review panel, which is theoretically responsible for assuring that the ingredients found in cosmetic and similar products are safe for consumer use.
In it’s almost 30 years of existence, however, that panel has reviewed just 11% of the 10,500 cosmetic ingredients listed by the FDA. According to the Environmental Working Group, the remaining unassessed 89% of ingredients are used in over 99% of all products on the market."
So basically, instead of a neutral group of scientists testing the ingredients, people hired by the cosmetic industry are the ones conducting the tests... Hmmm.
As Europe has higher standards for what is deemed safe, some companies opt to sell different versions of their products where the less toxic versions are sold in Europe and the cheaper, more dangerous variants are sold in America.
If you are in an activist kind of mood, you can visit The Campaign for Safe Cosmetics website and find out more about what steps you can take to pressure better regulation of toxic substances... Ultimately your dollar does the voting, so please have a look at the Cosmetic Safety Database and don't buy poisonous products - regardless if they are on sale!! I'll keep you posted on natural options for skin and body care and hopefully natural medicinal care as I learn more about it.
Calendula - Marigold
I've been baby supply shopping these past few days and I've been somewhat overwhelmed by the number of products which boast about having calendula in them. I've been looking some things up about it and it's mainly referenced as a skin soother although the reference I found on Herbalpedia.com also mentions it being used for fungal infections like atheletes foot and ringworm. Additionally, it is supposed to be good for female complaints like pain during periods, cystitis and yeast infections.
Here is a recipe for a preparation to treat yeast infections copied from the Herbalpedia reference above:
Marigold Douche: 2 ¾ oz rosewater, 1 tsp
marigold tincture, 1 tsp comfrey tincture. Mix
all the ingredients and shake well. Dose: 1 tsp
in 1 cup of warm water as a douche for thrush,
cystitis, etc.
There are some technical terms that I still haven't learned like the difference between tincture, oil and water...but hopefully that will come soon.
The reference is really useful in that it describes cultural history and myths about the plant but also goes into detail about how it is used by many forms of complementary medicines like homeopathy, Traditional Chinese Medicine, aromatherapy, emotional and veterinary uses... Also, so many recipes! Teas, food, salves, etc.
It looks like you need to purchase access to this reference but this article is available for free.
There is a correspondence school that I'm looking into for personal interest on HerbMentor.com which is also where I found out about Herbalpedia.
I've signed up for a phytotherapy course (healing with plants) here in Germany that should be starting up soon. In general, I'm really looking forward to having a better grasp on treating common illnesses...straight from our (balcony) garden. :)
Here is a recipe for a preparation to treat yeast infections copied from the Herbalpedia reference above:
Marigold Douche: 2 ¾ oz rosewater, 1 tsp
marigold tincture, 1 tsp comfrey tincture. Mix
all the ingredients and shake well. Dose: 1 tsp
in 1 cup of warm water as a douche for thrush,
cystitis, etc.
There are some technical terms that I still haven't learned like the difference between tincture, oil and water...but hopefully that will come soon.
The reference is really useful in that it describes cultural history and myths about the plant but also goes into detail about how it is used by many forms of complementary medicines like homeopathy, Traditional Chinese Medicine, aromatherapy, emotional and veterinary uses... Also, so many recipes! Teas, food, salves, etc.
It looks like you need to purchase access to this reference but this article is available for free.
There is a correspondence school that I'm looking into for personal interest on HerbMentor.com which is also where I found out about Herbalpedia.
I've signed up for a phytotherapy course (healing with plants) here in Germany that should be starting up soon. In general, I'm really looking forward to having a better grasp on treating common illnesses...straight from our (balcony) garden. :)
Friday, April 8, 2011
Medicine Monopoly
Here is a really great link I found on treating yeast infections with natural remedies. It's actually a site on STDs but the info is really helpful.
I was getting frustrated with all the information on the web about symptoms and transmission but there's practically nothing out there on treatment. Maybe everyone is just afraid of being sued or something but I think it's ridiculous that the only treatment advice most websites have is to contact your doctor as if you were too stupid to treat yourself or as if the only remedies out there need a prescription.
Doctors seem to have a monopoly on information.... I want(ed) to go to medical school but the tuition alone is $160k, that means the only way I would have access to medicinal information and counsel would be to make an appointment, wait the standard 40 minutes in the waiting room, tell the doctor what I have, pay him to listen, pay the lab tech to confirm what I already know and then get a prescription for some chemicals.... There's got to be a better way.
There has got to be more health and body awareness and a way to learn about treating yourself and your family that doesn't involve needing to contact a doctor, especially if you already know what it is ailing you.
As I'm nearing the end of my pregnancy, I've been thinking about what I would like my child to know off the bat about non-chemical remedies.
Humans have survived for thousands of years without chemical medicine - and I'm talking about the small annoying illnesses like yeast infections, Athlete's Foot, etc. - so there's also got to be a huge heritage of medicines which are readily available to the common man, we just need to turn back to a natural approach to life and taking a bigger interest in our own well-being instead of pushing that responsibility onto someone that doesn't know us and is making a living off of our being sick.
I was getting frustrated with all the information on the web about symptoms and transmission but there's practically nothing out there on treatment. Maybe everyone is just afraid of being sued or something but I think it's ridiculous that the only treatment advice most websites have is to contact your doctor as if you were too stupid to treat yourself or as if the only remedies out there need a prescription.
Doctors seem to have a monopoly on information.... I want(ed) to go to medical school but the tuition alone is $160k, that means the only way I would have access to medicinal information and counsel would be to make an appointment, wait the standard 40 minutes in the waiting room, tell the doctor what I have, pay him to listen, pay the lab tech to confirm what I already know and then get a prescription for some chemicals.... There's got to be a better way.
There has got to be more health and body awareness and a way to learn about treating yourself and your family that doesn't involve needing to contact a doctor, especially if you already know what it is ailing you.
As I'm nearing the end of my pregnancy, I've been thinking about what I would like my child to know off the bat about non-chemical remedies.
Humans have survived for thousands of years without chemical medicine - and I'm talking about the small annoying illnesses like yeast infections, Athlete's Foot, etc. - so there's also got to be a huge heritage of medicines which are readily available to the common man, we just need to turn back to a natural approach to life and taking a bigger interest in our own well-being instead of pushing that responsibility onto someone that doesn't know us and is making a living off of our being sick.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Tea Tree and Me
I haven't always been a fan of tea tree oil. First off, it stinks and when you are nauseous, that definitely isn't a fragrance you want to have anywhere near you. But here are some reasons why I love it!
Fungal infections -
Athlete's foot is a nasty, really itchy infection that people get on their feet and in some cases it can spread to your hands, etc. At first it looks like a pink rash with small bumps that itches in a "drive you crazy" non-stop way and the more you scratch, the more it spreads. If left untreated, the little bumps turn into blister looking bubbles that contain a clear liquid which causes the infection to spread faster as you scratch them open and the ooze flows to other parts of your foot. (That's what my experience was..I got it on my hands as well but not as bad.)
Treatment: I tried over the counter stuff that didn't work. They are normally creams and with this type of infection, it is important that your skin in the afflicted areas stay dry...so I don't understand the use of cream that takes a while to seep in and may cause your feet to be extra sweaty in your socks. I then went to a podiatrist who gave me a prescription, also for a cream - after a month the infection was mostly gone.
Tea Tree Oil: I bought a small bottle at Trader Joe's just because it was there and I'd heard a lot of good things about it, but I had no idea what to use it for or how. In an itchy fit and out of cream I grabbed the bottle, put some on a cotton and applied it to my foot. Within seconds, it stopped itching. It was amazing. Even with the prescription strength dose of cream, my feet would itch for at least an hour and I had to be care to air them out and let the cream seep in. With this stuff, I just wiped it on and then oil seemed to almost evaporate and my foot was dry.
Note: I have elephant skin, meaning that it is very difficult to irritate it. I've never really suffered from acne or other scalp/skin sensitivity and my typical approach to skin care is to find the most acidic soap or shampoo on the market - if my skin doesn't squeak after washing, it's not clean. So, please do not apply this oil directly to your skin. Please dilute with another oil before applying to your body (as tea tree oil won't dissolve in a water based substance). My husband has a chronic fungal infection on his hand that is stress related, and for him, I diluted a few drops of tea tree oil in some olive oil and applied it with a cotton.
Ear Infections -
I've been hanging out in water way too much in an attend to persuade Mini to turn from breech into a head down position. Hello, ear infection. I looked it up and it's caused by bacteria. Basically, water gets trapped in the ear canal which provides a breeding ground for bacteria.
Treatment: My family has used garlic oil in the past because of it's anti-bacterial properties... But from my experience, it doesn't really do anything very quickly, plus, I don't have any at my house. :o) Ha. So!
Tea Tree Oil: Here comes tea tree oil. I looked online and the suggestion was to put about 10 drops into about a tablespoon of olive oil, warm it up and pour into the affected ear. Hmm. I was in too much pain to warm it up and I was too freaked out to pour all that in my ear. So, I just mixed olive oil and tea tree together got a Q-Tip, soaked it in the mix and very gently pressed the soaked tip on the opening of my ear so that maybe only one or two drops of oil started to run down the sides of my ear canal. I waited a few seconds to see if it would burn or feel better. The pain didn't change but I felt like some of the water in my ear was shifting. So, I repeated the soaked Q-Tip thing a few more times, so that a drop or two went down basically every angle of my ear canal. I laid down on the opposite ear and waited. After 40 minutes the pain was gone and I had a collection of watery, waxy stuff in my ear that I wiped out with a clean Q-Tip. There was still pain if I pressed on my ear, but it was nice to be able to walk around and not have it hurt.
Note: Never, ever pour pure essential oils into your body!
Those are the two infections that I have used tea tree oil on, but it also has anti-viral properties as well. You know warts and stuff like that? It should take care of those too.
Just FYI, the Tea Tree comes from Australia and has been used by aboriginals for centuries. There is a growing plantation of Tea Trees in California since the anti-bacteria, anti-fungal and anti-viral properties are becoming more well known and the oil is becoming more frequently used.
Fungal infections -
Athlete's foot is a nasty, really itchy infection that people get on their feet and in some cases it can spread to your hands, etc. At first it looks like a pink rash with small bumps that itches in a "drive you crazy" non-stop way and the more you scratch, the more it spreads. If left untreated, the little bumps turn into blister looking bubbles that contain a clear liquid which causes the infection to spread faster as you scratch them open and the ooze flows to other parts of your foot. (That's what my experience was..I got it on my hands as well but not as bad.)
Treatment: I tried over the counter stuff that didn't work. They are normally creams and with this type of infection, it is important that your skin in the afflicted areas stay dry...so I don't understand the use of cream that takes a while to seep in and may cause your feet to be extra sweaty in your socks. I then went to a podiatrist who gave me a prescription, also for a cream - after a month the infection was mostly gone.
Tea Tree Oil: I bought a small bottle at Trader Joe's just because it was there and I'd heard a lot of good things about it, but I had no idea what to use it for or how. In an itchy fit and out of cream I grabbed the bottle, put some on a cotton and applied it to my foot. Within seconds, it stopped itching. It was amazing. Even with the prescription strength dose of cream, my feet would itch for at least an hour and I had to be care to air them out and let the cream seep in. With this stuff, I just wiped it on and then oil seemed to almost evaporate and my foot was dry.
Note: I have elephant skin, meaning that it is very difficult to irritate it. I've never really suffered from acne or other scalp/skin sensitivity and my typical approach to skin care is to find the most acidic soap or shampoo on the market - if my skin doesn't squeak after washing, it's not clean. So, please do not apply this oil directly to your skin. Please dilute with another oil before applying to your body (as tea tree oil won't dissolve in a water based substance). My husband has a chronic fungal infection on his hand that is stress related, and for him, I diluted a few drops of tea tree oil in some olive oil and applied it with a cotton.
Ear Infections -
I've been hanging out in water way too much in an attend to persuade Mini to turn from breech into a head down position. Hello, ear infection. I looked it up and it's caused by bacteria. Basically, water gets trapped in the ear canal which provides a breeding ground for bacteria.
Treatment: My family has used garlic oil in the past because of it's anti-bacterial properties... But from my experience, it doesn't really do anything very quickly, plus, I don't have any at my house. :o) Ha. So!
Tea Tree Oil: Here comes tea tree oil. I looked online and the suggestion was to put about 10 drops into about a tablespoon of olive oil, warm it up and pour into the affected ear. Hmm. I was in too much pain to warm it up and I was too freaked out to pour all that in my ear. So, I just mixed olive oil and tea tree together got a Q-Tip, soaked it in the mix and very gently pressed the soaked tip on the opening of my ear so that maybe only one or two drops of oil started to run down the sides of my ear canal. I waited a few seconds to see if it would burn or feel better. The pain didn't change but I felt like some of the water in my ear was shifting. So, I repeated the soaked Q-Tip thing a few more times, so that a drop or two went down basically every angle of my ear canal. I laid down on the opposite ear and waited. After 40 minutes the pain was gone and I had a collection of watery, waxy stuff in my ear that I wiped out with a clean Q-Tip. There was still pain if I pressed on my ear, but it was nice to be able to walk around and not have it hurt.
Note: Never, ever pour pure essential oils into your body!
Those are the two infections that I have used tea tree oil on, but it also has anti-viral properties as well. You know warts and stuff like that? It should take care of those too.
Just FYI, the Tea Tree comes from Australia and has been used by aboriginals for centuries. There is a growing plantation of Tea Trees in California since the anti-bacteria, anti-fungal and anti-viral properties are becoming more well known and the oil is becoming more frequently used.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Orgasmic Birth
I just finished reading Orgasmic Birth by Elizabeth Davis and Debra Pascali-Bonaro and I loved it!
In a nutshell it puts forth the idea that pain during childbirth is actually a myth and does not need to be the norm. In studies referenced in the book, those women who believed childbirth would be painful did have a painful birth while those who did not, experienced shorter labors and less pain during childbirth. One of the books (among the many recommended throughout the book) is also referenced in Laura Kaplan Shanley's Unassisted Birth, which I'm reading now, called Childbirth Without Fear by Grantly Dick-Read. In his book he explains that fear and anxiety are the keys to a painful birth. In Orgasmic Birth, the connection between the psychological emotions of fear and anxiety directly tie in to pain through the brain's release of adrenaline which tightens your muscles in preparedness for fight or flight. It also reduces the amount of oxytocin in your body - the "love hormone" that causes contractions, your muscles to relax and stretch and changes your and the baby's emotional state to that of calm and increased bonding ability. It is said that the receptors for pain and pleasure are located in the same part of the brain, so that you cannot experience pleasure without being open to pain. Some say that contractions are not necessarily painful - although there are circumstances when they can be like when the baby isn't in the right position and back labor... The idea is to remove the expectation of pain and the anxiety that comes with it. The more you fight contractions or try to be strong through them, the more pain you will experience. If you allow the contractions to flow through your body in the faith that your body knows what it's doing and all is going well, there will be less pain perceived pain and more of a surge of energy.
Another point that I thought was interesting is that privacy is really stressed as is creating a birth environment that feels comfortable and safe to you. One reference was made to how animals birth and that if watched, labor reduces and can even stop. So, it is very important that wherever you choose to have your child, that you feel open and relaxed.
For those that suffered abuse - This was particularly interesting for me. No other book I have read so far has dealt with laboring women who have experienced serious trauma and I loved that this book emphases sexuality in a positive, personal way. An anecdote is given of one woman who came to the hospital and would not progress past 3cm in the 5 hours that she was there. The doctor ordered Pitocin (artifical oxytocin without the positive bonding side effects) to get things moving along. While the nurse went away to get the needed IV fluids, the woman confessed that she was scared that she'd never feel what it was like to be pregnant again. It had taken her 3 years to get pregnant and she didn't want to lose the feeling of a baby inside her. She began sobbing uncontrollably and within 30 mins the baby was born - the doctors didn't have enough time to give her the Pitocin and basically had to run to catch it. So, the book also asks you to be aware of what you are holding on to emotionally. It says that crying as well as laughing are acts of letting go so have people tell you jokes if you feel stuck.
One last thing before I have to run... Movement is unbelievably important. I didn't realize until now how important the mother's walking, standing, hip shaking along with gravity helped the baby move along and get into a good birth position. Do not listen to anyone that tells you that you need to be lying down during labor. Do what feels good and right to you. So far in everybody book I've read, lying down on your back is the worst thing you can do. You don't have the force of gravity working with you and vital veins which nourish the lower half of your body and the baby are impeded by the weight of your baby, which means less oxygen for you both. Also, eat and drink what you like and makes you feel good. The book says that you burn about the number of calories during labor as you would during a 50 mile hike, so stay hydrated and bring snacks with you.
If you're interested:
Orgasmic Birth - The book came out after the documentary film. Info on both can be found there.
Unassisted Birth.com
The Bradley Method of Husband Coached Birthing
In a nutshell it puts forth the idea that pain during childbirth is actually a myth and does not need to be the norm. In studies referenced in the book, those women who believed childbirth would be painful did have a painful birth while those who did not, experienced shorter labors and less pain during childbirth. One of the books (among the many recommended throughout the book) is also referenced in Laura Kaplan Shanley's Unassisted Birth, which I'm reading now, called Childbirth Without Fear by Grantly Dick-Read. In his book he explains that fear and anxiety are the keys to a painful birth. In Orgasmic Birth, the connection between the psychological emotions of fear and anxiety directly tie in to pain through the brain's release of adrenaline which tightens your muscles in preparedness for fight or flight. It also reduces the amount of oxytocin in your body - the "love hormone" that causes contractions, your muscles to relax and stretch and changes your and the baby's emotional state to that of calm and increased bonding ability. It is said that the receptors for pain and pleasure are located in the same part of the brain, so that you cannot experience pleasure without being open to pain. Some say that contractions are not necessarily painful - although there are circumstances when they can be like when the baby isn't in the right position and back labor... The idea is to remove the expectation of pain and the anxiety that comes with it. The more you fight contractions or try to be strong through them, the more pain you will experience. If you allow the contractions to flow through your body in the faith that your body knows what it's doing and all is going well, there will be less pain perceived pain and more of a surge of energy.
Another point that I thought was interesting is that privacy is really stressed as is creating a birth environment that feels comfortable and safe to you. One reference was made to how animals birth and that if watched, labor reduces and can even stop. So, it is very important that wherever you choose to have your child, that you feel open and relaxed.
For those that suffered abuse - This was particularly interesting for me. No other book I have read so far has dealt with laboring women who have experienced serious trauma and I loved that this book emphases sexuality in a positive, personal way. An anecdote is given of one woman who came to the hospital and would not progress past 3cm in the 5 hours that she was there. The doctor ordered Pitocin (artifical oxytocin without the positive bonding side effects) to get things moving along. While the nurse went away to get the needed IV fluids, the woman confessed that she was scared that she'd never feel what it was like to be pregnant again. It had taken her 3 years to get pregnant and she didn't want to lose the feeling of a baby inside her. She began sobbing uncontrollably and within 30 mins the baby was born - the doctors didn't have enough time to give her the Pitocin and basically had to run to catch it. So, the book also asks you to be aware of what you are holding on to emotionally. It says that crying as well as laughing are acts of letting go so have people tell you jokes if you feel stuck.
One last thing before I have to run... Movement is unbelievably important. I didn't realize until now how important the mother's walking, standing, hip shaking along with gravity helped the baby move along and get into a good birth position. Do not listen to anyone that tells you that you need to be lying down during labor. Do what feels good and right to you. So far in everybody book I've read, lying down on your back is the worst thing you can do. You don't have the force of gravity working with you and vital veins which nourish the lower half of your body and the baby are impeded by the weight of your baby, which means less oxygen for you both. Also, eat and drink what you like and makes you feel good. The book says that you burn about the number of calories during labor as you would during a 50 mile hike, so stay hydrated and bring snacks with you.
If you're interested:
Orgasmic Birth - The book came out after the documentary film. Info on both can be found there.
Unassisted Birth.com
The Bradley Method of Husband Coached Birthing
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Rhesus Negative
Ever since I was little, I've known that I would have to get a shot when my baby is born because of the risk that my body will develop anti-bodies against its positive blood.
About 85% of the population have the positive blood type, which is tolerant to a negative blood type baby so that this isn't an issue for you if you are positive.
I didn't know that it is becoming increasingly common to give women one of these shots around the 28th week in case the mother's and baby's blood comes in contact. My midwife was very forceful in her opinion that I should get this shot and was appalled with me for not being aware of this procedure.
I have since done some research on the subject and spoken to a non-practicing gynecologist friend who herself has 5 children, all through homebirth. According to her and the Encyclopedia of Nursing and Allied Health, a woman has a 45 in 10,000 chance that blood contact will be made and antibodies formed. So less than 0.5%. The injection reduces a woman's risk by 0.1%. Hmmm. These points alone started getting me thinking. One of the reasons why this shot is pushed so strongly onto woman is that it is expensive and pharmaceutical companies make a lot of money off it. So that's why I'm being called irresponsible by my midwife...but I also wanted to know what is in it. It is apparently made from donor blood which puts you at risk for blood borne illnesses like AIDS and Mad Cow Disease. My husband was outraged and asked, "Don't they test that stuff??" Well, how many medical forms have you filled out where they ask you if have received a blood transfusion? It is known that blood from blood banks is not sterile. I remember one case in particular where people were getting AIDS from blood transfusions because although new donors were now being screened for HIV and AIDS, old blood that they had already collected was not being tested...too expensive for them. So, there is a risk that you might get a deadly disease from this shot and possibly transfer it on to your baby. Then there is the risk that the preservative Thimerisol is in the Rhogam injection. Thimersol is a known neurotoxin and there are no studies which document the permanent affects of it on infants. Most manufacturers have eliminated it but there is still the possibility that you might get "one of the bad ones."
With all of that information, I have to ask...are my risks of getting a blood borne illness and possibly poisoning my child with Thimersol, worth the 0.1% benefit the shot offers me?
I personally cannot agree with getting the shot now. There are obviously cases when it is recommended, where a woman's risk to develop antibodies is much higher than my 0.45% chance, and in that case the shot is a good idea because it will also provide more protection.
Needless to say I am a little frustrated with my midwife for making me feel like I am endangering my child, when she didn't even provide those statistics so that I could make an informed decision. Maybe she isn't even aware of the practically non-existent risk.
I will be getting the shot after the baby's birth so that I don't develop antibodies when our blood potentially mixes. I've heard scary stories that once antibodies have developed, the risk for miscarriage, etc. increase and my body will continue to try and kill any positive blood typed baby. I would need to be constantly monitored if that happens. Therefore I am only receiving the shot after birth, to prevent that from happening.
And for now, for my baby, I don't need unnecessary nonsense.
About 85% of the population have the positive blood type, which is tolerant to a negative blood type baby so that this isn't an issue for you if you are positive.
I didn't know that it is becoming increasingly common to give women one of these shots around the 28th week in case the mother's and baby's blood comes in contact. My midwife was very forceful in her opinion that I should get this shot and was appalled with me for not being aware of this procedure.
I have since done some research on the subject and spoken to a non-practicing gynecologist friend who herself has 5 children, all through homebirth. According to her and the Encyclopedia of Nursing and Allied Health, a woman has a 45 in 10,000 chance that blood contact will be made and antibodies formed. So less than 0.5%. The injection reduces a woman's risk by 0.1%. Hmmm. These points alone started getting me thinking. One of the reasons why this shot is pushed so strongly onto woman is that it is expensive and pharmaceutical companies make a lot of money off it. So that's why I'm being called irresponsible by my midwife...but I also wanted to know what is in it. It is apparently made from donor blood which puts you at risk for blood borne illnesses like AIDS and Mad Cow Disease. My husband was outraged and asked, "Don't they test that stuff??" Well, how many medical forms have you filled out where they ask you if have received a blood transfusion? It is known that blood from blood banks is not sterile. I remember one case in particular where people were getting AIDS from blood transfusions because although new donors were now being screened for HIV and AIDS, old blood that they had already collected was not being tested...too expensive for them. So, there is a risk that you might get a deadly disease from this shot and possibly transfer it on to your baby. Then there is the risk that the preservative Thimerisol is in the Rhogam injection. Thimersol is a known neurotoxin and there are no studies which document the permanent affects of it on infants. Most manufacturers have eliminated it but there is still the possibility that you might get "one of the bad ones."
With all of that information, I have to ask...are my risks of getting a blood borne illness and possibly poisoning my child with Thimersol, worth the 0.1% benefit the shot offers me?
I personally cannot agree with getting the shot now. There are obviously cases when it is recommended, where a woman's risk to develop antibodies is much higher than my 0.45% chance, and in that case the shot is a good idea because it will also provide more protection.
Needless to say I am a little frustrated with my midwife for making me feel like I am endangering my child, when she didn't even provide those statistics so that I could make an informed decision. Maybe she isn't even aware of the practically non-existent risk.
I will be getting the shot after the baby's birth so that I don't develop antibodies when our blood potentially mixes. I've heard scary stories that once antibodies have developed, the risk for miscarriage, etc. increase and my body will continue to try and kill any positive blood typed baby. I would need to be constantly monitored if that happens. Therefore I am only receiving the shot after birth, to prevent that from happening.
And for now, for my baby, I don't need unnecessary nonsense.
Monday, February 14, 2011
My Midwife and Me
I now live in a very small community of tight-knit Swabians in Southern Germany. Swabians, I think I can honestly say are not very liked by other Germans. They are known to be cheap, gossipy, get up at the crack of dawn to militantly sweep their drive ways and shout curses at you for not doing the same. It is a conservative group of people with a small town superiority complex. Oh, and they're mostly farmers. This is not where I expected to end up after spending the last five years of my life in hippy Berkeley and merry San Francisco. It is very hard as a foreigner to accept being shoved on the bus by little old ladies and to be blatantly stared at by whole groups of them as if their parents never told them that staring was rude. Friendliness is not in their character and it's a very frustrating, boring existence for both me and my husband.
In the midst of this culture shock, that I am still battling 7 months later, I had to find a person to trust with the delivery of my child. We all know how I dislike German medical staff for their total lack of basic human decency towards their patients so I hope you can all empathize with the inner struggle I was going through - as well as the verbal and mental abuse I had to tolerate from these people. The first place I went to to interview the midwives was a clinic in downtown Stuttgart. After my first visit, I already knew this was not the place for me but I kept going there as I didn't know where else to turn. As things progressively got worse, I finally decided to meet with a woman who came recommended by a coworker. The first meeting went really smoothly as she came to our house and explained the procedures she usually follows for a homebirth. A few days later I felt like I needed to explain some more things to her that were important to me. I had been reading about the Bradley method (husband coached birth), Orgasmic Birth and Unassisted Birth. Due to experiences I had in my childhood, I was extremely important to me that she understand "her place" in my birthing experience. I wanted it to be clear that my husband was the main and most important person to me and that I didn't want her to take on that role or try to force him out at any point so she could get a better look or be more involved in the action. What I really wanted was privacy and space and to have this experience with my husband as we bring our baby into the world together. I wanted her to just be there in the background or wherever in our small apartment and just hang out and "be there" should I have any questions, fears or doubts. I wanted to be able to birth my baby, not have her deliver it.
What followed were some stressful emails and phone calls where I was called egotistical, closed off and unwilling to listen to information. It was a very stressful time of trying to explain the same thing over and over again but not feeling like I was being heard. I still feel that she has this idea that my husband and I are afraid of medicine, we're not. We're afraid of incompetent people and the poorly informed....
My last meeting with the midwife was yesterday where she left me some homeopathic remedies that are supposed to make me more "open to new information." When she left, she asked if it was ok to go through our library as we have about a dozen birthing books... I don't know what she means when she tells me I am closed minded and selfish. I feel that by reading as much as I do about as many natural birth methods I can find, that I am very open to options, positions and treatments. I think women who sign themselves up for a medicated birth in a hospital and just expect their baby to be delivered, are the closed off ones. Anyway, one of the last things she said to me kind of confused me... She said "You want an unassisted birth, in German we call that a homebirth (Hausgeburt)". At that point I felt like all the information I had sent her on what an unassisted birth is had fallen on deaf ears. No. A homebirth is when someone births at home with a midwife or other medically trained assistence. Unassisted birth is a form of homebirth where there is no medical staff present, period. From that definition alone, it should be clear that I do not want an unassisted birth. I want a private, customed tailored birth designed specifically for me by me where a midwife is present. I want and consume volumes of information on the subject and it is a mystery to me how she can tell me I am closed off to information. Obviously she does not understand me or my motivations and I've kind of tuned out the name calling and labeling at this point.
It's a pretty strange relationship we have...I guess it works because I feel like she respects my decisions, even though she may be confused by or defensive towards them. I feel that she will honor whatever I choose to do and in return I just have to deal with her not fully comprehending what it is and let her label me as closed off and willfully ignorant. A little frustrating, granted, but at least I know how she works and thinks and I'm sure I'll be given the space I want for myself and my growing little family.
In the midst of this culture shock, that I am still battling 7 months later, I had to find a person to trust with the delivery of my child. We all know how I dislike German medical staff for their total lack of basic human decency towards their patients so I hope you can all empathize with the inner struggle I was going through - as well as the verbal and mental abuse I had to tolerate from these people. The first place I went to to interview the midwives was a clinic in downtown Stuttgart. After my first visit, I already knew this was not the place for me but I kept going there as I didn't know where else to turn. As things progressively got worse, I finally decided to meet with a woman who came recommended by a coworker. The first meeting went really smoothly as she came to our house and explained the procedures she usually follows for a homebirth. A few days later I felt like I needed to explain some more things to her that were important to me. I had been reading about the Bradley method (husband coached birth), Orgasmic Birth and Unassisted Birth. Due to experiences I had in my childhood, I was extremely important to me that she understand "her place" in my birthing experience. I wanted it to be clear that my husband was the main and most important person to me and that I didn't want her to take on that role or try to force him out at any point so she could get a better look or be more involved in the action. What I really wanted was privacy and space and to have this experience with my husband as we bring our baby into the world together. I wanted her to just be there in the background or wherever in our small apartment and just hang out and "be there" should I have any questions, fears or doubts. I wanted to be able to birth my baby, not have her deliver it.
What followed were some stressful emails and phone calls where I was called egotistical, closed off and unwilling to listen to information. It was a very stressful time of trying to explain the same thing over and over again but not feeling like I was being heard. I still feel that she has this idea that my husband and I are afraid of medicine, we're not. We're afraid of incompetent people and the poorly informed....
My last meeting with the midwife was yesterday where she left me some homeopathic remedies that are supposed to make me more "open to new information." When she left, she asked if it was ok to go through our library as we have about a dozen birthing books... I don't know what she means when she tells me I am closed minded and selfish. I feel that by reading as much as I do about as many natural birth methods I can find, that I am very open to options, positions and treatments. I think women who sign themselves up for a medicated birth in a hospital and just expect their baby to be delivered, are the closed off ones. Anyway, one of the last things she said to me kind of confused me... She said "You want an unassisted birth, in German we call that a homebirth (Hausgeburt)". At that point I felt like all the information I had sent her on what an unassisted birth is had fallen on deaf ears. No. A homebirth is when someone births at home with a midwife or other medically trained assistence. Unassisted birth is a form of homebirth where there is no medical staff present, period. From that definition alone, it should be clear that I do not want an unassisted birth. I want a private, customed tailored birth designed specifically for me by me where a midwife is present. I want and consume volumes of information on the subject and it is a mystery to me how she can tell me I am closed off to information. Obviously she does not understand me or my motivations and I've kind of tuned out the name calling and labeling at this point.
It's a pretty strange relationship we have...I guess it works because I feel like she respects my decisions, even though she may be confused by or defensive towards them. I feel that she will honor whatever I choose to do and in return I just have to deal with her not fully comprehending what it is and let her label me as closed off and willfully ignorant. A little frustrating, granted, but at least I know how she works and thinks and I'm sure I'll be given the space I want for myself and my growing little family.
Mama Says "No!"
I've been planning my homebirth here in Germany, pretty much since I got pregnant. The medical system here is a little confusing and it's difficult to understand who is responsible. A few months ago I read in the paper about a doctor who instead of removing a cyst from a woman's kidney, removed the whole kidney and damaged the other one. The woman died the same day. It seems that it was more convenient for the doctor to just take out the whole kidney instead of performing competent surgery which would have left her with two healthy kidneys - which is what she gave him authorization to do. The family is suing but as far as I know, nothing has happened to the doctor. He is still practicing medicine.
I have my share of horror stories when it comes to German doctors but I won't go into that now. For the moment, I just want you to know how scared I was moving back to Germany to have my baby and deliver it into incompetent hands. It's been something that has kept me up at night, terrified that I might choose some monster like my parents did "for me." This trauma of incompetent, apathetic doctors and parents has made me one of the most "resourceful" or paranoid people I have ever encountered.
Most of the books I'm reading about natural childbirth are from American sources. As I read through the chapters and descriptions of what to expect from an American hospital birth, I am somewhat surprised at the amount of freedom birthing women are given here especially when it comes to their right to decide what their babies will be given after birth.
In Germany -
Every pregnant woman gets a little book where the midwife, the doctor and the ultrasound record their results from each meeting. At first I was annoyed by this, that my midwife didn't have some centralized record keeping system that was shared with hospitals and (!) what if I lose the book? All records of my pregnancy will have been lost! I've gotten used to the idea and like to look at the entries every now and then and see what the ultrasound tech wrote about the size of my baby or when we heard the heartbeat with the midwife. It's nice. It's also something handy to have - I just decided - if you are having an unassisted birth and are doing your own prenatal care. It's really not rocket science. I think this experience is actually bringing me more in tune with how my body works and how to do basic health checks on myself.
Jumping to after the birth and you are holding your baby - In the state where I live Baden-Wuerttemberg, they do not put anything into babies eyes after birth. That goopy stuff they force on you in a lot of hospitals in America called Erythromycin is meant to prevent the mother from giving her baby STD germs. In Germany, at one of the first meetings with a midwife, you will have blood drawn if you wish to test for STD, if positive, then you know that you should be vigilant when it comes to the health of your baby's eyes, if negative no worries. Since I was tested, I know I have nothing to worry about and I love that the default is to give the baby nothing. I think it was in The Babytalk Insider's Guide to Your Baby's First Year where I read about alternatives to the goop. They recommended gently wiping your baby's eyes with a damp wash cloth with a little echinacea root on it or putting a few drops of breast milk in the baby's eyes if you notice that they are red or gunky. Breast milk was by far the most recommended "treatment" on the forum sites I visited. So, as a mama who doesn't want unnecessary chemicals put in her baby's eyes, which makes the baby's vision even more blurry thus impairing bonding, this Mama says No to goop and Erythromycin!
Another thing is the Hep B shot that they give babies en masse when they are born without regard for whether either of the parents has the illness. I looked it up online and for the most part, the biggest symptom of Hep B is liver failure (if you were curious: Hep B Symptoms, About the Vaccine). I am not against vaccinations in general but I am very protective of my baby. I don't think it's necessary for my newborn to get this shot. It is recommended in the US that a baby get this vaccine between birth and 2 months of age. There is no requirement in Germany for your child to have this vaccination. Mama says No to Hep B vaccination - especially since I've been tested for it..
Then there's the Vitamin K shot (see: Vit K, Inject Or Not?). The shot is meant to reduce the risk internal bleeding into the brain caused by liver disease in the newborn that goes undetected. The risk of your child having this illness is 5/100,000. The main problem is that liver disease impairs the baby's ability to produce blood clotting chemicals from the Vit K in his system - so the injection is supposed to help the baby by giving it more Vit K to work with. The argument against this injection is that it is known to increase your child's risk of cancer (leukemia) as Vit K promotes cell division - and cell division that gets out of hand is called cancer. There are a few different studies some saying it increases your child's odds by 80% and some say it up the odds by 10-20%. Either way, your child's odds of getting leukemia from Vit K are higher than your child having the illness it is supposed to treat in the first place. The main argument being made by people against this injection is that it is a ridiculously high amount of Vit K to be pumping into a small baby in one injection. Two alternatives are suggested, if you really want to give your baby Vit K. One would be that you give your baby several small doses of Vit K per mouth "possibly 200 micrograms per week for 5 weeks, totaling 1 milligram, even more gradual introduction may be better" and the other is for the breastfeeding mother to take Vit K supplements herself which then gets transferred to the baby via milk. Anyway, this Mama says no to a massive dose of Vit K right after birth. Not necessary and potentially dangerous. Friggin give me a vitamin and I've got it covered!
I have my share of horror stories when it comes to German doctors but I won't go into that now. For the moment, I just want you to know how scared I was moving back to Germany to have my baby and deliver it into incompetent hands. It's been something that has kept me up at night, terrified that I might choose some monster like my parents did "for me." This trauma of incompetent, apathetic doctors and parents has made me one of the most "resourceful" or paranoid people I have ever encountered.
Most of the books I'm reading about natural childbirth are from American sources. As I read through the chapters and descriptions of what to expect from an American hospital birth, I am somewhat surprised at the amount of freedom birthing women are given here especially when it comes to their right to decide what their babies will be given after birth.
In Germany -
Every pregnant woman gets a little book where the midwife, the doctor and the ultrasound record their results from each meeting. At first I was annoyed by this, that my midwife didn't have some centralized record keeping system that was shared with hospitals and (!) what if I lose the book? All records of my pregnancy will have been lost! I've gotten used to the idea and like to look at the entries every now and then and see what the ultrasound tech wrote about the size of my baby or when we heard the heartbeat with the midwife. It's nice. It's also something handy to have - I just decided - if you are having an unassisted birth and are doing your own prenatal care. It's really not rocket science. I think this experience is actually bringing me more in tune with how my body works and how to do basic health checks on myself.
Jumping to after the birth and you are holding your baby - In the state where I live Baden-Wuerttemberg, they do not put anything into babies eyes after birth. That goopy stuff they force on you in a lot of hospitals in America called Erythromycin is meant to prevent the mother from giving her baby STD germs. In Germany, at one of the first meetings with a midwife, you will have blood drawn if you wish to test for STD, if positive, then you know that you should be vigilant when it comes to the health of your baby's eyes, if negative no worries. Since I was tested, I know I have nothing to worry about and I love that the default is to give the baby nothing. I think it was in The Babytalk Insider's Guide to Your Baby's First Year where I read about alternatives to the goop. They recommended gently wiping your baby's eyes with a damp wash cloth with a little echinacea root on it or putting a few drops of breast milk in the baby's eyes if you notice that they are red or gunky. Breast milk was by far the most recommended "treatment" on the forum sites I visited. So, as a mama who doesn't want unnecessary chemicals put in her baby's eyes, which makes the baby's vision even more blurry thus impairing bonding, this Mama says No to goop and Erythromycin!
Another thing is the Hep B shot that they give babies en masse when they are born without regard for whether either of the parents has the illness. I looked it up online and for the most part, the biggest symptom of Hep B is liver failure (if you were curious: Hep B Symptoms, About the Vaccine). I am not against vaccinations in general but I am very protective of my baby. I don't think it's necessary for my newborn to get this shot. It is recommended in the US that a baby get this vaccine between birth and 2 months of age. There is no requirement in Germany for your child to have this vaccination. Mama says No to Hep B vaccination - especially since I've been tested for it..
Then there's the Vitamin K shot (see: Vit K, Inject Or Not?). The shot is meant to reduce the risk internal bleeding into the brain caused by liver disease in the newborn that goes undetected. The risk of your child having this illness is 5/100,000. The main problem is that liver disease impairs the baby's ability to produce blood clotting chemicals from the Vit K in his system - so the injection is supposed to help the baby by giving it more Vit K to work with. The argument against this injection is that it is known to increase your child's risk of cancer (leukemia) as Vit K promotes cell division - and cell division that gets out of hand is called cancer. There are a few different studies some saying it increases your child's odds by 80% and some say it up the odds by 10-20%. Either way, your child's odds of getting leukemia from Vit K are higher than your child having the illness it is supposed to treat in the first place. The main argument being made by people against this injection is that it is a ridiculously high amount of Vit K to be pumping into a small baby in one injection. Two alternatives are suggested, if you really want to give your baby Vit K. One would be that you give your baby several small doses of Vit K per mouth "possibly 200 micrograms per week for 5 weeks, totaling 1 milligram, even more gradual introduction may be better" and the other is for the breastfeeding mother to take Vit K supplements herself which then gets transferred to the baby via milk. Anyway, this Mama says no to a massive dose of Vit K right after birth. Not necessary and potentially dangerous. Friggin give me a vitamin and I've got it covered!
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Memory Cards
My dad came down for a visit and started promptly uploading his photos to his laptop. He does this a lot, to the point where it might be considered a little OCD. Well, he tells me that he's had multiple memory cards fail on him. Luckily he had just recently uploaded all his photos so nothing was lost. He said "I know, it may seem like I do it the the extreme." However, that's why he's always doing it, so those precious memories aren't lost. I'd never heard of that before and since my camera and memory card will be 5 years old in December, I will be compulsively uploading my photos to my computer lest my card fail. That reminds me, where's my camera cable? Just that I would write about it since I had never even heard about that happening. Happy clicking!
Birthday Cake
I consider myself a pretty good baker, just ask my family. A couple years ago, I asked my husband what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday. We had just watched a movie about this woman who made these out-of-this-world pies with "different" flavor combinations. One of her creations was raspberry chocolate pie. So of course my husband's response to my cake question was "How about raspberry chocolate pie?" Right. Ok, how hard can that be? I get online and do a search. It took awhile to find a recipe that had not only good reviews and a decent picture, but also an ingredient list that wasn't a mile long. It looked good and wasn't too involved so I thought why not. I must say, that was the best raspberry chocolate pie I have ever had. Well, that's really not saying much because it was the only raspberry chocolate pie I have ever had. It wasn't too sweet and was actually quite light.
Ok, so this year I asked my son what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday. I don't know why I even bothered. His past birthdays, he wouldn't even try his cake so I don't even have a picture of him eating cake at his second birthday. Anyhow, my son requested blueberry cake. I'd say blueberries are his number one food request right now. I'm like "Ok, blueberry cake. Right." So I go online again and find two recipes that look equally as good and I can't decide. I try to ask my peeps on Facebook to vote, however, had very little participation. So I showed my son the pictures of the cakes and asked him which one he like best. He picked the one I was leaning toward. Blueberry cream cake. Really nice cake. Again not too sweet or heavy. My parents really liked it as did the other party guests. Of course, my son would not touch the cake and I only got him to taste the tiniest little bit today. So if you're looking for cake ideas for any occasion, give these a whirl.
http://www.tasteofhome.com/Recipes/Chocolate-Raspberry-Pie
http://www.cookiemadness.net/2008/09/nova-scotia-blueberry-cream-cake/
*Note: for the blueberry cream cake I used light sour cream. Don't think it made a bit of different. It was so good with fewer calories.
Ok, so this year I asked my son what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday. I don't know why I even bothered. His past birthdays, he wouldn't even try his cake so I don't even have a picture of him eating cake at his second birthday. Anyhow, my son requested blueberry cake. I'd say blueberries are his number one food request right now. I'm like "Ok, blueberry cake. Right." So I go online again and find two recipes that look equally as good and I can't decide. I try to ask my peeps on Facebook to vote, however, had very little participation. So I showed my son the pictures of the cakes and asked him which one he like best. He picked the one I was leaning toward. Blueberry cream cake. Really nice cake. Again not too sweet or heavy. My parents really liked it as did the other party guests. Of course, my son would not touch the cake and I only got him to taste the tiniest little bit today. So if you're looking for cake ideas for any occasion, give these a whirl.
http://www.tasteofhome.com/Recipes/Chocolate-Raspberry-Pie
http://www.cookiemadness.net/2008/09/nova-scotia-blueberry-cream-cake/
*Note: for the blueberry cream cake I used light sour cream. Don't think it made a bit of different. It was so good with fewer calories.
Homemade lactose free yogurt
Ok, my family is lactose intolerant. It's just milk though. We're fine with pretty much everything else, oh, except ice cream. I started buying Kefir instead of drinkable yogurts, because my son prefers to drink his yogurt. Kefir is 99% lactose free, which is a great bonus. Anyhow. The first round of lactose free yogurt was a little disappointing. I live in South Texas and I only have HEB done here. There are two different types of lactose free milk that are HEB brands. The first round of yogurt, I used the "Lactose Free Milk" HEB has. It's a lot sweeter than the other option and my son always thinks I'm giving him flavored milk with this one. Well, the yogurt was runny and elastic. There's a bunch of crap in the milk like guar gum. Guar gum in milk? I'm confused. So, I strained the yogurt for 24 hours and ended up making frozen yogurt out of it. It was really tasty and we couldn't get enough. So in anticipation of my parents coming to visit for my son's birthday yesterday, I wanted to make some homemade Greek yogurt to make tzatziki for the lamb they were bringing. This time I used the 2%"Mootopia" lactose free milk and used 2% Greek yogurt as my starter. (Last time I used both whole milk and yogurt.) It worked perfectly. I adjusted the recipe a little so I wouldn't have left over milk/yogurt mix. I didn't have quite enough to fill my 8 yogurt cups so I will adjust it again next time. I forgot to get fresh dill for the tzatziki, but other than that it was quite tasty.
Recipe:
3 Tbsp yogurt
5 cups of milk
The recipe says to heat the milk to a boil if it is not already treated at Ultra high temps to kill of any bacteria in the milk. I haven't done this step and haven't had any problems. If you do boil the milk make sure it is completely cold before you mix it with the yogurt. I adjusted the recipe to:
3 Tbsp yogurt
3 1/2 cups milk
Next time I will up the milk to 4 cups so I have enough to fill all my cups. Set the yogurt make to 9 hours and cook. Once it's done. Put the lids on the cups and cool in the fridge. And there you have it. I bought my yogurt maker at Goodwill. Totally scored. I've seen recipes for the crock pot but don't have one to try it in.
Recipe:
3 Tbsp yogurt
5 cups of milk
The recipe says to heat the milk to a boil if it is not already treated at Ultra high temps to kill of any bacteria in the milk. I haven't done this step and haven't had any problems. If you do boil the milk make sure it is completely cold before you mix it with the yogurt. I adjusted the recipe to:
3 Tbsp yogurt
3 1/2 cups milk
Next time I will up the milk to 4 cups so I have enough to fill all my cups. Set the yogurt make to 9 hours and cook. Once it's done. Put the lids on the cups and cool in the fridge. And there you have it. I bought my yogurt maker at Goodwill. Totally scored. I've seen recipes for the crock pot but don't have one to try it in.
To each his own
Babies are meant to be spoken to, held, and rocked among other things. I believe my son to be a smart child, but I am his mother and am supposed to think that right? Well, I have a lot of strangers comment on how chatty he is for his age. I feel that is mainly because I was always engaging him and talking to him. I didn't allow him to cry for very long unless it was/is bed time. And even then it broke my heart listening to it and feeling like "Well, the experts say this is the best way." Well, I've learn otherwise since my son was a baby and if ever there should be another little one in our home, I will do things differently. Anyhow, I was holding a fussy baby this evening. I was patting her back, talking to her, just walking around letting her see what was going on. I was finally able to sit down with her and continued patting her back and rocking back and forth on the couch. She was calm most of the time I held her and finally fell asleep. The mother commented "She likes you. You're good with her." This woman has more than one child and I never see her talk much to the infant or engage her. Maybe it's just the times that I see them, but I find that very odd. The baby "likes" me and responded to me, because I talked to her and reassured her. Not that she can truly understand what the heck I'm saying, but a calm voice does tend to have a calming effect on a person.
I find that with my son, patience for us has been wearing thin since he hit about 2 and 1/2. I try to remind myself that he is only 3 and that he doesn't know any better or he's not doing it out of spite. However, he is a lot smarter than your average 3 your old (again in my humble opinion) and I do find myself telling my son "You know better than that!" Yes, repetition is key at this age and I know that, but in the heat of the moment every thing goes out the window. He is such a stubborn child and the stand offs that occur at our house can be taxing on everyone. I find myself looking for books and forums that can tell me how to deal with my son's behavior without flying the handle most days. Today was a good day for us all. He had a fever all day yesterday on his birthday and woke up this morning all better. He was the sweetest little thing all day today and I am hoping that means his tantrum days are over. However, I know that the answer to that is "Yeah right!" Being stubborn is a good thing. He won't give up easy and he will try until he succeeds. He has the all the drive he will ever need to be a success in today's society.
I know my past has a lot to do with how I react today. I keep telling myself I am going to "talk" to "someone" and get my issues with the past sorted out so I can move on and learn how to deal with life in a better and more positive way. Until I can though, I will be reminding myself that "He is only three." Repetition, repetition, repetition.
Back to the fussy infant. Just holding her and rocking her made me think about my son. Of course he is perfect in every way. He is such a gentle soul and I need to nourish it more. He was sent to me for a reason and I know he would not thrive in the environment this little infant is in. To each his own. I'm not judging. Just ranting. This woman as an older child that is sweet, helpful, and very friendly. So I know her children are perfect in their own way. We have different parenting views, I guess is all I'm trying to say in this long rant. To each his own.
I find that with my son, patience for us has been wearing thin since he hit about 2 and 1/2. I try to remind myself that he is only 3 and that he doesn't know any better or he's not doing it out of spite. However, he is a lot smarter than your average 3 your old (again in my humble opinion) and I do find myself telling my son "You know better than that!" Yes, repetition is key at this age and I know that, but in the heat of the moment every thing goes out the window. He is such a stubborn child and the stand offs that occur at our house can be taxing on everyone. I find myself looking for books and forums that can tell me how to deal with my son's behavior without flying the handle most days. Today was a good day for us all. He had a fever all day yesterday on his birthday and woke up this morning all better. He was the sweetest little thing all day today and I am hoping that means his tantrum days are over. However, I know that the answer to that is "Yeah right!" Being stubborn is a good thing. He won't give up easy and he will try until he succeeds. He has the all the drive he will ever need to be a success in today's society.
I know my past has a lot to do with how I react today. I keep telling myself I am going to "talk" to "someone" and get my issues with the past sorted out so I can move on and learn how to deal with life in a better and more positive way. Until I can though, I will be reminding myself that "He is only three." Repetition, repetition, repetition.
Back to the fussy infant. Just holding her and rocking her made me think about my son. Of course he is perfect in every way. He is such a gentle soul and I need to nourish it more. He was sent to me for a reason and I know he would not thrive in the environment this little infant is in. To each his own. I'm not judging. Just ranting. This woman as an older child that is sweet, helpful, and very friendly. So I know her children are perfect in their own way. We have different parenting views, I guess is all I'm trying to say in this long rant. To each his own.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Well, Hello!
This blog has a few reasons for coming about. I guess the obvious one is that I've moved to Germany and am suffering from culture shock and too much time due to my being pregnant. For the last 10 years, I've lived in the San Francisco area and graduated from UC Berkeley just last year. I really enjoyed the open minded community, the variety in beliefs, entertainment and different landscapes that California offers from the mountains in the Central Valley where my family is from to the Berkeley Hill and the San Francisco coast. Living in such a versatile environment has introduced me to lots of different cultures which has made me a fairly open person. Especially, having spent so much time in Berkeley where natural food, yoga and meditation seem to be the basis for existence, I've developed an interest in those subjects mainly for personal reasons but it's nice to be able to share little things I've learned with people I care about.
Now that I'm pregnant, my interests and concerns about good food, exercise and bodywork (massage, baby!) have extended to natural child care and how to give my baby the best of what's available.
My younger sister had her first baby a few years ago, which was a shock for me being older and having always thought that I would be first to do everything... I guess we're all ready at different times. Anyway, it was just interesting to see that the choices she made when it comes to taking care of her baby and now toddler are the same that I see myself making. As she is more knowledgeable and has more experience than I do, I've asked her to help me write this blog about how to make and maintain a healthy, happy baby, family, home and self!
Obviously, what we post here will for the most part be information and insights from other sources along with our own experiences. We will try to give credit where it is due to authors, websites and fellow bloggers.
And before this gets much longer, it was nice of you to check in. Stop by again soon.
Susan & Andi
Now that I'm pregnant, my interests and concerns about good food, exercise and bodywork (massage, baby!) have extended to natural child care and how to give my baby the best of what's available.
My younger sister had her first baby a few years ago, which was a shock for me being older and having always thought that I would be first to do everything... I guess we're all ready at different times. Anyway, it was just interesting to see that the choices she made when it comes to taking care of her baby and now toddler are the same that I see myself making. As she is more knowledgeable and has more experience than I do, I've asked her to help me write this blog about how to make and maintain a healthy, happy baby, family, home and self!
Obviously, what we post here will for the most part be information and insights from other sources along with our own experiences. We will try to give credit where it is due to authors, websites and fellow bloggers.
And before this gets much longer, it was nice of you to check in. Stop by again soon.
Susan & Andi
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